I really think that living in Benson is just the right place for us...well mostly Andrew. My new visiting teaching companion's name is Michelle, she lives across the street. We are also in Young Womens together. We had a funny conversation on Wednesday as we compared our Non-hunter wives vs. Hunter husbands and the results of such a combination. She, as well as me, never hunted, had a husband who did, got a gun for Christmas, was "urged" to go (meaning practically forced) and because she wanted to spend time with her husband she went. She grew up in Randolph, so even though she didn't hunt, she was surrounded by it and was a bit of a country girl anyway.
After a laughing and comparing stories and realizing we had quite a bit in common, the trouble began. She then starts telling Andrew and I about her hunting experience with an Elk and how she didn't think she could do it, but that she really liked it and got a really big Elk. She, like myself, has only ever shot 2 other things (birds). She had also explained that she was the only girl among all these guys out hunting...yada yada yada. Because of this story, Andrew now believes that I would love going and would really like getting myself an Elk. EVEN THOUGH I keep telling him I don't think I could do it, I think I would feel really bad and it would not be fun for me to shoot such a big pretty animal, let alone scare me to death. He believes this is because I have never done it before and don't know what I am missing.
I don't really know what to do. I don't think that he will let me NOT go, without a big fuss/argue until he has convinced me that his point is the only true and living point. If I do go, I think I will be so nervous and scared and unwilling to actually shoot the thing that I will completely chicken out, save the life of the Elk and Andrew will be really mad. You know, I can go and I can watch Andrew do it, but for me to do it myself, I take it too personal and start thinking about its family and all of its friends and wonder if Heavenly Father is going to be mad at me for killing it.
What should I do?
9 comments:
I say don't go. If you're not comfortable with it then don't do it and don't let yourself be forced to do it or made to feel bad if you don't go. Andrew will understand.
I don't think you should go either! I have been put into a sitiuation where I didn't want to be and I felt so uncomfortable! I was coaxed/forced into going and I wanted to please my husband and do what he wanted to do. Well It was the worst night of my entire life! Tucker felt so bad because I felt so bad and uncomfortable. I think it's part of the husband's "job" to make sure his wife is comfortable and happy and feels safe! Right? Anyway good Luck! Love ya!
Oh DeAnna, growing up with you I would have never thought that you of all of us would have a husband that wants you to go hunting and kill an Elk! I don't mean to make light of the situation you are in, but it made me smile to read it, just thinking of you with a gun trying to shoot an animal sooo much bigger than you are. :) I agree with the other two not to go and get in an uncomfortable situation, but also to do what you think is best for you and your husband.
Invite Andrew to scrapbooking party and see how he likes it.
Well it seems the vote is pretty much the same. I NEVER thought that you or most other people who lived practically with the elk would want to hunt them. Can I just say if I tell Skyler I don't want to do something "boyish" with him he says fine call your mom and sisters and go do something fun with them. AND he tells me to plan around his thing so he can watch the kids while I go. Just a thought! Good luck though. :)
haha, what a predicament! Well, I agree that if you're not comfortable and it's not something that's going to better your life, than don't do it! For fun, though, you could try and think of something that would be so painfully boring and girly, and then tell Andrew that if he'll do that then you'll go on a hunt with him. It has to be a good trade, though, and if he happens to give in to your side of the bargain you could always go and pretend to aim the gun and somehow have such a bad aim that you always are off by 20 feet! lol Good luck!!
I too have been in a situation I felt "strongly coerced" into. It caused me so much anxiety about making everyone happy during a very stressful time that I didn't enjoy myself as much as I know I could have. On the flip side, I DID actually have more fun than I expected.
I agree with Betsy, if he cares that much about you coming that he is willing to do the same for you than you know how much it really means to him.
Alas, I am no help here. I went fishing with Richard and the kids last month and after casting and almost immediately reeling in a fish, I couldn't get the poor thing off the hook. Finally, after much effort, I got him off, but only after mutilating his mouth beyond belief. I put him in the water to swim away, but he only floated belly side up.
After that experience, I felt so miserably bad that I swore to Richard I wouldn't fish again. He keeps trying to convince me that the fish survived, but I have serious doubts. If I can't handle killing a little slimy fish, I am know for sure I could never shoot an animal with such beautiful eyes as an elk or deer. Sorry Andrew. Unless I'm starving, it just isn't going to happen.
Okay, I just read Sheena's response and I laughed myself silly. I have had the same picture in my head since you met your hunter.
So, go hunting with Andrew, but bring your sketchbook or something equally entertaining to you. I have done that on occasion when Richard wanted me along on a fishing trip. I sat on the shore and sketched the scenery while he fished a few feet from me. Good times.
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