Our Sweet Charlie

There are things that chronologically would take place before this post, but I am so devastated and heartbroken, I don't know what to do.  We lost our dog Charlie tonight and I feel like honoring my buddy. 

He was my first child.  In a time when I was unable to have kids, he cuddled with me.  He kept me company when Andrew would leave on hunting trips.  He would nuzzle his nose into my hand to make me pet him.  Every day when I would come home, he would be waiting for me at the back door to wish me hello.  He sat with me in the garden while I pulled weeds and occasionally would sit right in my way until I gave him the attention he wanted.

He was protective.  He would claim the vizsla puppies as his own.  When a strange dog came over, he freaked out on him, corralled all the puppies under my car and then took off after the big dog again.  He also nearly attacked Dad when he was playing with the kids.  Dad had a big growl and was pretending to "get" one of the kids.  Charlie took it for an attack and Andrew had to catch Charlie out of the air as he flew toward Dad ready to stop him from getting the kids.

We have a lot of other big dogs and Charlie was a fraction of the size, but that didn't stop him from playing.  He would bark and nip and run around in circles.  We called him the short guy on the basketball team.  He would run and play with just as much energy, just wasn't as tall :).

He loved me.  If he had a choice, my lap would be the one he would find.  He would get uncomfortable after a while though and would plop on the ground to sleep.  He had a fun personality.  He was friendly and welcoming of other people.  There were only a few times that he growled at someone when they came over.  One time was an insurance salesman (ha ha) and he even peed on his leg.

I always joked about my dog being my first kid.  I felt that I had to clarify for people that I wasn't calling their babies, dogs, but that I just thought very highly of my dog. 

Tonight I was in the garden when I hard the car hit him.  He didn't make any noise, but I knew immediately what was wrong and went running.  I got about 15 feet away and I lost my breath.  He was twitching a little, but it was clear that there was not going to be a recovery (to save you the gruesome details).   I ran in the house and got Andrew.  I'm pretty sure I went into shock.  I couldn't cry, but I couldn't think straight either.  Our neighbor had come running too and told Andrew to go take care of his wife.  Andrew came and we hugged.  We had just lost a family member.  One that symbolically was the glue during some really hard times in my life.  The tears came.  We told the kids and put (or sent rather) to bed.  Andrew and I just sat there and cried and now, unsure of what to do.  I just want to look at my dog and talk about him.